Soul Searching

I've done a lot of soul searching the last couple of days, and something has been made clear to me. I'm not going to wait I'm going to carry on TTC for better or worse. Yet another one of my Facebook friends announced that she was PG. Every time I hear a PG announcement I feel like a bigger piece of me is missing. The hubs and I have talked and if he doesn't find work when a baby finally arrives then I will go back to work and he will be a stay at home dad for a while. My dream is for me to stay home but if that doesn't work out then that's fine. Hopefully if I do get PG my pregnancy won't be high stress and I can carry on working. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it, I'm going to go with the flow and see what happens you can't plan everything the way you want. Hopefully the hubs will find work soon.

So next month it's back to temping, my new insurance kicks in soon. So I'm going to make an appointment to see what's going on, 5mths still no PG however I am getting regular cycles. Maybe I'm not ovulating strong enough. We shall see. I do want to thank everyone for your kind messages advice and support. :-)

It's been a while I have been so busy with my new job I haven't really focused too much on TTC. DH and I are not really preventing, however I haven't really tempted in a while. AF arrived on time last month so I'm still getting regular cycles. My heart is still aching for a little baby it's been so strong over the last few days, and now a friend I've become really close too is now expecting. I'm going to see her pregnancy progress and will wish everyday I was PG.

I can't decide what to do whether to carry on temping and watch my cycles closely or just wing it and see what happens. I really don't want to prevent, however DH still hasn't found work. I feel like I'm in a rock and a hard place all I know is that these feelings aren't going away they are so strong.

Things Happen for a Reason

Today has been such an emotional day, it started out with AF arriving. I was so disappointed seeming I had such a huge temp spike yesterday. I am glad however that I am getting AF regularly every month it shows that my body is working right now and it must mean that I'm ovulating regularly.

This afternoon I get a call from a Graphic company I interviewed last week. Looking back I feel I answered some questions wrong. But guess what? I got the job!! I am so excited and can't believe it. I'm hoping our luck is turning around.

I am nervous though starting a new job. I do want some people's opinions though do you all think we should continue with TTC right now? Money won't be a problem seeming I'll have a nice new job, but I worry if I become PG before Clay get's a job. Again it's what ifs? I just wanted some opinions on the matter.

Major temp rise

My temp shot up this morning to 98.5 the highest it's ever been. I was so excited I took a test BFN. I was looking at the test and imagining there was a line, what am I crazy or something?  - I even took the test apart to examine it closer. I think I might have a couple of screws loose or something.

In other news a couple of my facebook friends have announced that they are expecting. I''m happy for them I really am. I just wish I could say that without feeling the green eyed monster lurking behind me. Jealously is a horrible feeling, and I wonder when will it be our turn.

Waiting...

I am 11dpo and I'm surprised I haven't tested yet. I think a part of me thinks I'm not even PG this month as I didn't have much of a chance. I guess we shall see what happens.

On another note I'm debating on closing this blog down. Not many people come by and comment and I rarely visit other people's blogs.

Here we go again.

Well here I am again in the 2 week wait, apparently I'm currently 3dpo. I'm not holding out much hope for this cycle as it looks like my O day was 3-4 days early. My chart clearly shows that I had a thermal shift on CD16 FF also gave me my crosshairs on that day. My CM wasn't even fertile around that time and I'm not even getting EWCM anymore the first month I was off the pill I had loads of it last month nothing this month nothing. It just seems to be watery. I haven't been getting any positive OPKs funnily enough I started testing on CD16 so it looks like I did probably O then and I missed the surge a couple of days before.

It's just so frustrating the last two cycles were CD19 and 20 and now it's gone to CD16 there's no way of catching it if my O day is jumping all over the place. I very much doubt we will get a BFP this month as we only really had one Bedding session on CD14. It's possible but I highly doubt it.

Cre from Confessions of a TTC-A-Holic nominated me for an award. I must list 10 things that make my day and then list 10 blogs who deserve this award.  Wow - only 10?  If I nominate you, please do the same on your blog!

Here goes: 10 things that make my day:

1.  My husband telling me he loves me.
2.  Having the strength to go all the way on a trail walk.
3.  Being blessed that I've made some new friends on and off line.
4.  Thankful that I can still be apart of my family even if they are so many miles away.
5.  Going Bowling with friends.
6.  I'm amazed at how much my husband adores me.
7.  Proud that we made it out of Target without spending more than $75
8. Finding a nice frame at Michaels to frame a Christmas gift. Then finding out the Frame was on sale.
9. Returning a throw for the Sofa at Target and finding an even better one I liked and it was cheaper. 
10. Curling up on the sofa with the Hubs and watching a movie.

For my list of 10 Deserving Blogs:

1. Wstful Girl
2. Barren Blog
3. Letters To My Unborn Child
4. Confessions of an (Infertile) Shopaholic
5. Not a Fertile Myrtle
6. A hope and a wish for a gift from a petri dish
7. Woman Anyone?
8. Inconceivable
9. No Lingerie Here
10. Adventures in Baby Waiting

Oh BTW I also managed to get a feed going on my blog, so hopefully you'll be able to pick up my latest posts. You may want to update your links to refresh my blog.

A Pumpkin Baby

AF has been and gone and now I'm on CD7. I just realized that if we get a BFP this month we will be looking at a Thanksgiving baby. I'm so excited at the thought of this!! A little Pumpkin baby :)